Being a mother is the hardest, most thankless job I can think of and any day they can make it through without pulling out their hair is impressive. Dads try their best to help in anyway we can but lets face it our dad powers are usually dwarfed by MOMMY POWERS. Keeping those facts in mind here are the 10 reasons Being Dad is a Better Job than Being Mom
1) They like your unhealthy cooking – Of course mom makes the world’s greatest Thanksgiving Turkey or eggplant casserole but no makes a bacon, pepperoni grilled cheese sandwich better than dad. It is just a given that when mom is out of town the evening meal will purchased from a store or English muffin pizzas.
2) No judgment on clothing choices – No one bats an eye when you drag your kids to the store wearing a Batman cape and purple rain boots in the middle of summer because those are just some of the crazy things dads do.
3) Rough House – When the kids want to wrestle in the living room or play a crazy game of Nerf darts war they naturally gravitate to dad. They may do this because we’re cooler or just because we’re more likely to cover for them when they accidentally break the ugly vase received as a wedding present.
4) More attached to mom when younger – I love my kids to death but it didn’t break my heart when they request their mom hold them and comfort them all through their months of teething.
5) Don’t have to give birth – I don’t want to say this too loud but moms don’t get enough credit for giving birth. If you really stop and think about it, your wife squeezed another person out of her. I once had a kidney stone and was so traumatized from passing that three millimeter object that I still almost have PTSD.
6) Taking the credit if they’re good at sports – If they end becoming the next Joe Montana people will assume they got their athletic abilities from you and if they aren’t any good just quietly blame their mother.
7) Ask your mother - Your 12 year old wants a cell phone or your kindergartner wants to stay up late to watch a Daniel Tiger Marathon? Both of those inquiries get the same response, “Ask your mother”.
8) Corny Jokes – There is a reason they’re called corny dad jokes, because we tell them a lot and somehow find them very funny.
9) You don’t have to explain why she is getting her period – Dads may be forced to help explain the “Birds and the Bees” but when it comes to why a young girl is getting her first period that is all mom’s job.
10) Once again we don’t have to give birth – Seriously they had another human live inside them for over nine months and then pushed it outside them. No thanks.
My favorite is the rough housing since it comes so naturally; maybe the corny jokes is a close one. I don’t intentionally tell corny jokes, but my children classify them that way. Seems slightly unfair, because I know they are funny and my Dad is the one with the corny jokes.
I’m reaching the stage where my wrestling skills are less powerful than my trash talking skills: I have to make them believe I am still tougher then they are, and I’m starting to lose that battle!